Thankful...

Last evening I received this email from my brother who lives in Costa Rica. It read...

We were going to Playa Ventannas and passed the entrance, so I went to the next commercial center turned around and came back. I went to turn left, to enter the beach and some guy behind me went to pass and clipped the back end of our car, spun us around and we rolled the car three times. Its a miracle we walked away with only some bumps, bruises and scratches. We have a rental for now and the car was taken to San Isidro to the body shop. In the end, its only a car and we are OK. Hope to see everyone soon. -KC

A few things that he doesn't state in the email is...The driver's side roof collapsed all the away to the head rest. Keith was driving but not wearing his seat belt. When the car finished rolling he was standing where the driver's side window should have been. I am thinking in this case it was probably good Keith didn't have his seat belt on. He would have been strapped in and unable to move to land on his feet and possibly would have been crushed. Becky, who was wearing her seat belt, walked away with a scratch and a bruised elbow. Kian was with Becky's parents so he was safe. He now believes that God has a purpose for his life and he better live up to it. As he say...In the end its only a car...

Thank you Father for saving my big brother. I don't want to imagine life with out him right now. Here are a few pictures of his truck.

Grace & Love

I was just speaking of God's grace this morning and how amazing it is to be loved so unconditionally.

God has shown me a great deal throughout that past couple days of how difficult it is for us to extend that kind of love and grace to each other. Although that is exactly what we are called to do. I as a wife, daughter, sister, friend, am called to be a face to God's love and grace to those whom He places in my path.

I don't do it effectively enough at times but am constantly striving to understand HIS love and grace so I can be more like Him!

*before playing this video please mute the side bar music*


Watch the video again...and ask God to show you...

What sign would I be holding?

"Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord." Hebrews 1:2

FINALLY!!!

GOD IS GOOD!!! You will never believe it! It has finally happened!!! I can't wait to share this news with you!

I GET TO WEAR SHORTS THIS WEEKEND!!!!!!

Friday: partly cloudy. Much warmer with highs around 80. South winds 15 to 20mph.
Friday Night: partly cloudy. Not as cool with lows in the upper 50s.
Saturday: mostly sunny. Highs in the lower 80s. Southwest winds 15 to 20 mph.
Saturday Night: mostly clear. Lows in the mid 50s.
Sunday: mostly sunny in the morning, then becoming partly cloudy. Highs in the upper 70s.

DID YOU SEE THAT????? We FINALLY after 7 LONG COLD CLOUDY months will be able to wear shorts, open the windows, grill!!!! We'll be opening the pool and putting out the diving board soon!!! So come on over to GREAT North East Ohio for a swim!



I have to say Ohio summers are the best! It's coming I know it! I see God's promises everywhere I look!!!
















All this excitement makes me wonder...
What's your favorite season where you live?

Faith NOW

Did you realize that the word FAITH is used 256 in the Bible. That's not including the ones that talk about about being faithful or faithfulness. All combined there are 422. I never knew that.

This week God has really been speaking to me about faith and hope every where I turn. From the message on Sunday to a few blogs that I read. He has continued to till away at that soil in my heart. As Christians Faith is something that we stand firm on. Right? Why is it that sometimes what seems so simple is so hard to do. That NO MATTER what's happening or where I am I stand firm in my Faith in you God. Because YOU, the King of Kings have promised me, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1 He has clearly defined to us what FAITH is. My favorite example to use with kids when they start questioning God is to take them outside and have them feel the wind on their face. The conversation usually goes something like this...

"Did you feel that?"

"yeah I felt it"

"What was it?"

usually with a crazy look "it was the WIND Ms. Kara"

"I didn't see any wind? Are you SURE it was the wind? Wind can't exist...I can't see it?"

"i know it is there because I felt it"

"EXACTLY! We may not always be able to hear God but we can feel God. Does the wind not exist because we can't see it? NO we felt it and know it exists."

To a child all they need is to know that things exist with out seeing and they believe! If we could all enter in with such childlike faith. There are so many things that we are believing in faith and hoping for and earnestly seeking God for. There are times when He is quite...Does He not exist because He doesn't answer when we ask? No that's not the case.

One day when I look at God face to face I hope He doesn't say, "You of little faith, why are you so afraid?..." Matthew 8:26 Instead when I look Him and see my reflection in His eyes hearts desire is that He will say"...Well done, good and faithful servant!..." Matthew 25:21

What I have (re)learned this week is that what God has in store for us could be so much different and better than what we could have ever hoped for or dreamed of. But no matter what my faith, my hope, my praise MUST without a doubt stand firm in HIM!

Yesterday I read...“Hope is hearing the music of the future; faith is dancing to it today,” ~ William Frey.

When is it hardest for you to stand firm on your faith?

Spring has Sprung!

I decided to work from home today. I needed a break from the emotional roller coaster I feel like hasn't stopped in a while. Knowing Shawn would leave for work early I would have the entire day with just Sadie & I, thought I should take advantage of a day like this and work from my bed. There are still a TON of things that need to be done around the house that I will hopefully get to today, but as I sit here in bed with my third cup of coffee listening to the gentle rain outside I am reassured that Spring has Sprung.

When I think of Spring...I think of the restoration of new life of things that were once dead...And the birth of new life that has yet to enter this world. Ever since moving to Ohio I get so excited about my tulips popping out from the ground each spring. The anticipation of the pool cover coming off and the official 1st day of pool/grilling season!

The new life entering the world I see so clearly in Shawn does...Shawn works with farmers so I get excited about all the baby animals being born in the spring. One year I was able to feed a calf! And when the grower & Shawn had their backs turned I took the bottle out of her mouth and felt her lips and teeth buds and tongue!!! I know I'm weird but it was COOL!!! This year I am hoping to see a piglet and a lamb. Apparently we are going mushroom hunting one Saturday morning. Don't worry these aren't the kind you smoke! In just a few weeks we are going to pick out our new "baby". One of Shawn's growers has a yellow lab that is about ready to have puppies. They said we can have first pick! Sadie needs a playmate. At least that's what we are blaming the craziness of having two labs on.

Yesterday I played my harp at church for the first time in years. I LOVED IT!! I loved it with every ounce of my being! I was finally able to worship God with my music. It was only by His doing that I didn't throw up in front of everyone. I caught myself second service with my eyes closed just playing away! WORSHIPING! I could feel my soul saying AHHHHHHHHH...

This Spring I can't help but feel the tilling of the ground that God is doing in my heart. When I rest in Him I feel the work He's doing in me. I need the refreshing breeze of God's breath on my heart...my life. I need the sometimes painful tilling of my heart. I need the gentle rain of the tears of my spirit pooling up in God's hands. I need YOU Lord!

Winter seems to last forever here in Ohio. While there is some beauty in winter I wish it only lasted until January. That's kind of how I've felt here for a while. That I was stuck in my winter...in my dying state..in my desert...in my aloneness. But for the past month as much as I have tried to ignore it I feel God tilling away...plowing away in my heart. He has been planting new seeds, restoring and refreshing old plants, dreams and desires. He is moving me to a new harvest.

So now it is my time to arise from my winter...to leave my desert...where I have laid, wept, and prayed. Change my clothes, wash myself off in His presence and His glory and do something that has be difficult for me to do since leaving Rocky Mount...WORSHIP! I can dance and sing a new song of praise to my heavenly Father!

Spring has Sprung...What do you love best about Spring?

It's FRIDAY!

I'm not sure if I have ever been so happy to see Friday get here. With the passing of our first "baby" this week, the beginning of yet another cycle, and yet one more Dr.'s appointment it's nice to know it's FRIDAY! Saturday is coming...A day to rest reorganize and be restored. At least I hope that is what tomorrow brings.

As for my Dr's appointment. I waited almost an hour for a 3 minute conversation that consisted of Yep you defiantly ovulated and Yep you defiantly aren't pregnant this month but I don't see why you shouldn't be pregnant with in the next two cycles. I am praying he is right. I still haven't talked to Shawn about my appointment as of yet. Not sure if he is going to want to continue trying or if I have the emotional capability to to keep this going for two more months. Just praying that God will bring peace to whatever decision we go with.

Great news though...My tulips are getting tall by the day. Sadie had a great day at the doggie spa yesterday, and she is still in bed asleep next to me. She's such a good dog! It's going to be 70 degrees tomorrow! That means Spring is really here. And I get to clean this morning and have tomorrow off from both work and home! YEAH!!!

Enjoy your weekend! I know I will!!!

I Wish Someone Would Tell Me...

I have learned a lot this month by charting my temperatures. It is interesting to actually see it on paper. I have learned that I don't even come close to ovulating on the 14 day...it looks like I might even just ovulate twice in a month...I've learned that Drs can be wrong...all those years when I was told by one Dr not to take my basal body temperature because it was "barbaric" to tell if you were ovulating that taking my blood worked better was wrong...I've learned that my 6 month window of becoming pregnant after the surgery that I had in December is one month closer to coming to an end...I've learned that my husband is seriously struggling with this infertility issue.

What I wish someone could tell me is when to let go of my dream of being a mom? Is laying my dream daily down on the alter giving up? When is enough enough? When is my dream dead?

It's easier to a degree with My Dad, My Friend, My Dog...Letting them go was HARD oh so HARD. But I knew that #1 there were in a better place and were no longer ever going to be in pain or have to struggle again. #2 their physical death was the definite beginning of the letting go precess. It's hard to realize sometimes when your dreams die.

Do I still want to be a mom??? YES!!! I want to have Shawn's baby with ever ounce of my being. Until someone tells me I can't. But I often wonder if I should be letting go of this dream and moving forward into something else. I often wonder if that dream that I had in Rocky Mount about our son was just that only a dream.

My God is a God who performs miracles. Maybe having Shawn's baby isn't the miracle He wants to perform in me. He knows that plans that He has for me...He said He wants to prosper me and not to harm me...maybe having Shawn's baby would harm me. He said that He would grant me abundant prosperity in the fruit of my womb. Maybe that wasn't in baby form...What I'm trying to say is I DON'T DOUBT GOD...what I doubt is my interpretation of what I've read, heard, feel.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2Corinthinas 12:9-10.

And so the weaker I get, the stronger He becomes in me.

I go to the Dr tomorrow to take him my wonderful BBT chart and to see what the next step is. Then I come home to discuss the plan with my wonderful husband. We will pray about our plan lay it on the alter and ask God if and when we let go of our dream.

My 1st Baby

We lost our first baby last night. Razy was the best dogie and is now playing in heaven with my Dad. Swimming in the ponds...chewing on some bones...not in pain anymore!


About 2 months after Shawn & I got married we decided to add to our family. Shawn ALWAYS wanted a lab but being newly married we had no money. I saw a sign on the side of the road that said "FREE golden lab pups". Perfect! that is JUST what we needed. FREE PUPPY! I learned a very valuable lesson...no puppy is FREE...Quickly talked Shawn into going to get a puppy. So Sunday after church we went to go pick out our FREE golden lab puppy. We pulled into the yard, back past the house, and next to an outside pin filled with about 10 puppies and the mama. Mama did look like a yellow lab and so did all the puppies...except for one. Shawn told me I could choose, anyone that I wanted! I played, held, loved on almost everyone, then I spotted THE one in the back of the dog house that momma was protecting. I asked the young boy who came out to help us if I could see that one. I was love at first sight! She was so cute! All black head, a white necklace around her neck, white tipped paws, INFESTED with fleas and about 1/2 the size of all the other puppies there. THAT'S THE ONE!!! Shawn agreed and we took her home!


There were some "rules" put into place by my husband as we were driving home. She is to stay in her cage while we were at work. Not unreasonable. We are NOT spending a ton of money on toys. Ok. Within the week she must go to the vet. No problem. Under NO circumstances is she suppose to sleep in our bed. Sure. Brought her home bathed her with dish soap to get the fleas off and completely fell in love with this four legged baby. That night we put her in her cage and went to bed. She cried and cried!! Shawn the "rule maker" rolls over and says...."May be she could come and sleep with us?" I agreed and she never spent another night in the pin.


She truly was the perfect dog. Not too big not to small a perfect 35 pounds. She could hold her own around playing kids and loved to be snuggled by them. One of my ALLL time favorite pictures is when I would take Razy to the house where I was a nanny and she was laying in the middle of the living room and Annie would lay on her back with her thumb in mouth and her head on Razy's belly. She LOVED to be LOVED! She knew the difference between her all white paw and her mostly brown paw. My favorite trick, the one she hated the most, was she could balance a treat on her nose and in her day would flip it up in the air and catch it in her mouth. She LOVED swimming in the pool, beach, pond, water!!! We'd ask her if she wanted to take a bath and she would beat to the bathroom. She even swallowed and passed a golf ball when she was a puppy. She was the type of dog that made even those who didn't like dogs like her...Right Troy??? :) Whether it be Florida, Maryland, North Carolina, or Ohio she was a dog that would touch your heart when you met her!

Thank you God for taking her quickly. Thank you for almost 12 wonderful years with our first "baby". If you know us at all you know she was our "baby"! Thank you Father for your peace during this time. I would never give up the past twelve years for the sadness I feel today.

Who knew a dog would be missed by so many!

Rest in peace my Razy Girl!!!
June 14, 1997 - April 13, 2009
...she was born on our wedding day! yet one more thing that made her so special...

One Question...

I have to admit I think I have had the same hair style for almost 30 years. Well not really but a long time. I have been trying something new lately with my hair. Actually it's been about a year since my friend/hairdresser started straightening it but only a few months since I actually tried it. I can't decide which way is better...what do you think?

Straight? OR Curly?

I do realize the pictures aren't the best. I never claimed to be a photographer that's for sure. I also do realize that in the large scheme of things this really means nothing but... Just was thinking this would be a neat thing to see what other people who don't see me everyday or ever for that matter. By the way the cute adorable baby in the picture above is Kian...and those eyes are even more incredible in person. I'll have to see if I can find a newer picture that you can see his eyes in.

Hope you all are having a wonderful week!

Freckles

One of my friends here in Ohio has two little boys, ages 3 and almost 2. I was sitting at her house the other day and she was telling me a story about the 3 year old. Who by the way is 100% boy, wants to jump, climb, swing, and hunt anything that moves, but has the most caring side I have ever seen in a boy of that age. Any time you walk in the door he is so excited to see you and can not wait to wrap his arms around you. He is so sweet! She asked him to show me what he had got from the store. He comes up and shows me his arm. There are two tiny brand new freckles on his forearm.

Me: Wow Brayden those are nice freckles! Where did you get those from?
Brayden: I gott’em at the store.
Me: That’s pretty cool! How did you get them at the store?
Brayden: I paid for’em with my monies.

I laughed and he walks off very proud of his new freckles.

I just can’t help but think how much I want & can't wait to watch freckles grow.