Thankful

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in ALL circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 

There is ALWAYS something to rejoice in, pray for & give thanks for!

Today...March 4th was suppose to be our PC hearing...We were suppose to be celebrating the next step in adopting our son...BUT birth mom has a new "confined" location as of  this weekend. Knowing where she is by law they must serve her papers. Birth dad is pitching a fit the his parents wanting them to take him. They say they can't...I've lived with this little man for a year...As much as I love him IT IS HARD WORK! For some people who are in their mid-50's to 70's with health concerns being up all hours of the night loving a screaming teething child on less than 2 hrs of sleep is hard work! I get so stuck on knowing how to pray. I don't want to pray selfishly. 

I honestly do want what is best for this little man. My heart aches for him! I know that I know that I know this is not going to be an easy road...either way...but I know that I know that I know God has put him in our lives for a reason. I know he is a world changer. I know that God has a plan for him! It is one of prosperity & hope! Today I have to focus on 3 things...

Rejoice always! Father I rejoice because you are a Father that loves me unconditionally! You love this little man of God MORE than I do! I know you have his best interest at heart! I with out a doubt KNOW you have dreams for him that will be wild & crazy! That's why you have chosen US to be part of his world! 

Pray continually! Father you alone know the out come of this chapter of our lives. You are our protector, YOU are our provider! For you created this little man of God in the inner most beings of his mothers womb. I praise you for he is fearfully and wonderfully made! I know that full well! I ask that you continue to protect his destiny and give Shawn & I wisdom on how to raise him and how to handle each and every step of this process. Provide us with strength, peace and continued guidance.

Give THANKS! I thank you that the PC hearing was at 9AM and I didn't have to dwell on this all day. I thank you Father that in a few hours I will leave my job and will pick up our soon to be son, go home to a loving husband and enjoy my evening in a safe and warm home. I thank you Father that your favor sounds us like a shield! I thank you that your ways are better than my ways. I give you all the glory all the honer all the praise to YOU and you alone!

How can this be...

3 months, 90 days, 2,160 hours, 129,600 minutes ago our world changed...and we didn't even know it.
In the beginning I felt like a hypocrite when people would stop me and tell me how cute "my" baby was and ask me about his stats. He was so tiny...My favorite was when people would tell me how good I looked for having a baby that young. It MUST not be your first. Sometimes I would smile and thank them and move on about my day other times I would shock them and tell them that we were foster parents. Inevitably their response would be:
"I don't know how your do it!"
"What are you going to do when you have to give him back?"
"Aren't you attached to him?"
" How are you going to handle it if you don't keep him?"

To which I would reply

"I don't know how either. Only with God's grace"
"Probably Cry."
"INCREDIBLY! Wouldn't you be? Look at the face!"
"I'm not sure but I know that God is in control."

I thought a baby would be easier...it.is.not. While he doesn't say "I love you mommy. Don't leave me mommy. You my favorite mama." The way his smile lights up for me like it does for NO ONE else says it all. The way he snuggles in to me after his last bottle and falls asleep. The peaceful gaze that he gives when I feed him. The way he "talks" to me at bath time and laughs at me when I "buzz" my lips together. Don't get me wrong he giggles and looks and smiles and snuggles with others...it's just a little different with the mama.

We have a long way to go on this road. The journey has just begun...but for today I am able to enjoy the fact that he celebrates his 3 month birthday with us. No cake no party hats or streamers just a song and a lot of hugs and kisses.

Happy Birthday Sweet Love! You have no idea how you've changed my world...

3 Month Statistics
14.1 pounds
23" long
Sleeps through the night...most nights.
Eats 6oz bottles every 4-5 hrs & we just 1 bowl of cereal at night
Is beginning to put himself to sleep
LOVES to sit up
LOVES to watch the dogs
LOVES his play mat that sings to him
LOVES to be talk to
LOVE LOVE LOVES Bath time (next to eating it is his FAVORITE time of day)
Seems to enjoy his first few bowls of cereal
Smiles when I sing "HIS" song t him
Has met his Grandma C, Mimi & Papa
Likes to sit up to watch TV while he burps
Found his fists & LOVES to eat them
Doesn't like to burp but doesn't like the side effects of an upset belly either.
Has yucky acid reflux

"but as for me, I watch in HOPE for the Lord I wait for God my Savior, my God will hear me." Micah 7:7 
Please be in agreement with us that God will move quickly in this case & praying for HIS will to be accomplished. I am at peace knowing He already knows the ending of the story. But I have to remember sometimes moment by moment...there is a God and it is NOT me!